martedì 13 marzo 2012


Today I realized that the doctor's house it is way nearer to mine than I have ever thought i'd be.It's a pink house so that everybody in the village who's in need can recognize it and know where to be honest I think it is pink just for a tastes reason. Anyway, this evening I went for a walk with my dad in the sunset,and we decided to go round the kinda block we live in, and when we arrived on the opposite side of it, I sow the doc's house a few meters away. I never thought I could go walking till there, cause I didn't have the right perspective, I thought that my house was outside the village and the doc's house was in the village, so that I have had to first go to the village with the usual way, and from there, find the street where the doctor lives, and arrive to his house. it's pretty absurd how we can ralize stuff around us from an objective perspective so harldy and so late, and it's amazing how those little insignificant things can appear to us as if they were major discoveries and let us satisfied. :) Next time I'll need to see the doctor I'll now I can just decide an go by myself.


So, in the attempt to improve all the issues in my life, and my lazyness and fat, all the things that make my brightness and the beauty, the joy of life in me disappear, yesterday I decided to do something I haven't done in a long time. I had an appointment at the dentist for a full tooth cleaning treatment and, since I live in the surroundings of a small country village, I decided to go there by walk this time. My plan was to get up a little early, get ready with no rush, and take a lot of time to walk there, and eventually have breakfast in the village centre's cafe, if once there it would have been too early for the dentist. I didn't know how long it would take me to arrive there, 'cause my walking disability means that I walk much slower than usually people do, I don't run, and I get tired easely so I have to stop from time to time. Springtime is starting to introdce itself at these times, so it was a really nice, warm sunny morning, and as I know that when I move I feel too much warmth, I didn't wear a jacket. I took my work cellphone with me, some euros for the coffee shop, and I asked my father to borrow me his super i-pod. I decided to listen to music in order to entertein myself 'cause I get boared and annoyed very easely when I have to walk, whiich is something I have never enjoyed doing, also, I know dogs in the neighbourhood often bark at me as i pass by, and sometimes I get a little scared, so I didn't want to hear them. My journey to centre village was good. I didn't know how to deal with my energies so well, so I guess I walked too fast for most of the time so I got to stop a couple of times to take some deep breaths, I crossed some old people who I smiled and said goodmorning to, cause I was feeling so good and happy. Dogs didn't scare me cause I focused on the music, and sun and breeze overcame annoyment with happyness. When I arrived to my destination it was waaaay too early (I got out of my house about 1 hour and a half before the appointment and I guess that to a non-disabled person would take about 5-7 minutes walking to do that), and I was happy about that because I had decided I would induldge with a breakfast in the sun, on the outside of the cafè. I know this is not a good way to reward myself for a healthy walk, but it is almost the only reason why I would want to walk to a destination :D !! Well, the place is closed on monday and I didn't know..and the only other place easely reachable by foot from there closed a few years ago..I really didn't know what to do with myself at that point: pharmacy was full of peaple and there was no other shop I would have needed to go. So I just sitted in the steps in front of the dentist's door (and some other shops and offices), and listened to i-pod, just sun bathing for quite a long time.
It has been a great way to spend my morning. I was all satisfied (and my muscles too) for the effort done and I knew I deserved that rest, which is something that makes one enjoy it more. You need to know that I am an unconventional person, very playful and spontaneous at times, and I don't really care if some things I do are proper or not. Also, you have to know that I'm like a Disney princess, or somewhat the sthereotype of the itailian, and I basically looove to sing, I do it to express my feelings when I'm excited and when I'm blue, and, well, I do it All the time, also down the streets, just as princess Giselle does in the movie "Enchanted" (that's so me!) and the only way I know to enjoy a song is to sing along, I can't (and I won't) stop myself! So, I felt free and powerfull, and I was enjoying my daddy's tracklist as he put a lot of jazz in there, and I think I just sang a little too loud..I started singing a couple of songs over and over again, sitted in those steps, feeling the breeze through my hair, and the main one was: "Let's call the whole thing off" by Ella Fitzgerald and Luis Armstrong..doesn't this delightful song bring you to the athmospheres of the movie "When Harry met Sally"? It does to me, and it brought even more happyness in my way. Singing makes me happy, and it does the sound of my own voice from the inside of myself, so I sang and sang with all of my spirit, and after a little while I realized that all the elder people passing by the street walking or with their bycicle, would look at me. The fact is that I become a little self-centred sometimes, and I didn't think I could be bothering, but just communicating to them my joy, and so I went on this way for quite a time. All of a sudden my dentist opened the door and stepped out, he looked at me and smiled, I did the same, greet him and happily ask him "do I have to see you in a half an hour, is that right?", he nodded, I smiled and went back to my music thinking that it was quite unusual for him to just step out his door. I recognized a few people passing by for the second time as they were probably coming back from somethng they had done in the meanwhile, some food shopping probably, and a cute old gentleman walked in my direction to take his bycicle that he had left a few meters from me, I said hello, and I noticed that he started talking to me, so I took off the music from my ear and had a little chat with him, he basically asked me if I was waiting for someone, I said I was just waiting for my time to go to the dentist, and at that point he did something that surprised me: he yelled at the house at the other side of the street that "the girl" had to go to the dentist, a couple of elder women came out and said ok..I didn't think my singing had cought so much attention and that maybe my voice was heard from inside that house! The man then suggested me, and insisted for a few times, that I'd go inside the dentist's waiting room so I wouldn't take to much sun, but I refused cause I was enjoying the sunbath and the breeze. I found that little chat very pleasent at the moment, he called me miss and was very kind to me. I liked the fact that "the village was taking care of me". When I finally got to the dentist the lady before me, who was taking her way out, asked me if it was me, the girl singing outside before and complimented me for my nice voice, the dentist then told me he had came out to check because people told him there was someone sitted outside the studio and singing from a long time and he thought I might have needed some help.
When I live moments like these, when the semplicity of beauty fills my heart, I ask myself why I don't allow myself to live them everyday cause of my lazyness and fears, but at the same time I feel proud not to need a super active "have fun" party shedule to feel good and enjoy life even more..

Introducing myself

Good morning everyone and welcome to my new blog! This is going to be a personal blog where I'm going to talk about myself and my life experiences, plus everything that comes into my mind. I decided to do that in english, despite of the fact that I'm from Italy, because I'd like to communicate with people from all over the world and because I like the lenguage. My name means Joy and I'm 31 years old, but I guess younger at heart, and I actually have 2 other blogs. They are both mostly written in italian of course, and one of them is about cinema and movies I watch in a "feeling better" perspective, and in the other one I tell stories from my own travelling experiences, mostly in italian too. You will be able to find them in the sidebar. So, here are some of my biggest passions: writing (i write short stories since I was a kid), watching movies, talking forgeign lenguages, interculture communication, and travelling, which has become my business too now ( personal advisory for cultural & special needs travellers), yey!! I have been travelling a lot since..well, always, and that is something that really keeps me alive and spreads the best of me. I guess I was born to follow the wind.
I am living a quite changing long moment in my life lately, and I am struggling to live fuller, with more joy and being more me, so I decided I wanted a kind of diary to express all those things in. Also, I would like to write here about all those special moments I have lived in my exsistace that have had a deep meaning and have represented a soul or actual improvement in my consciousness of myself and the world. That's why I called this blog "level up!". This title also refers to me being a little nerdy :)
Even if I have never considered myself to be handicaped, I will talk here for the first time about my disability which is just one of my characteristics to me, so I know that I can be quite encouraging for other people to love life and that's a side of me I want to come out more, so maybe this blog will also help. I'd like to share the fact that this disease helped me being a more sensitive person and to experience things in life that for other people might be irrelevant or just the regular thing, which for me where kind of a happy event. That's why I say that I had the chance to deeper sense life.
What I hate the most is other people to relate to me as if I was a poor girl to have pity of, to help or to treat differently, so please don't do that, cause there's no reason to!
I never thought I would blog about those subjects but I finally understood that talking about them would have helped people to understand me better and to appreciate some parts of the things I tell and the way I live them. Also, I really wanted to share my happyness for some big little things in my life, and I want to express my joy for life and tell people they should appreciate more. I think bad things come to make you enjoy more the beautiful ones. Anyway I need to underline that my disability is really a minor one, and I just have some issues walking, so please note that everyone has his/her own level of difficoulty and his/her kind of troubles and a way to deal with them.
Disabily never stopped me to be an active and determined traveller. I have lived in Spain when I was a young girl, and in France as a reasercher, I have been twice in India, twice in Africa (Kenya and SouthAfrica), about 5 times in the U.S.A., in Mexico, Ecuador, Morocco, Egypt, Tunisia, Israel, Norway, maaany times in France and Spain, and Croatia, and many other places in Europe, ect. and I'm soon going to Cuba, which was one of my dream places, and I guess I'm going to tell about it in my travel blog, maybe in spanish, I'm still not sure. Had the most amazing times and experiences there I will maybe partially share here, if not in my travel blog. I speak english, french and spanish (and italian of course) but I'd like to learn more..maybe portuguese and the sign lenguage..
I don't feel like I'm from a specific place, but I feel like my soul is kinda spanish or latino, of course culturally I'm a lot of an italian, or better said mediterranian, I feel at home in Mexico and my spiritual side is indian. I have some hungarian and romanian heritages, I love the melting pot of U.s.a., I'd like my voice to be black, my joy is african, and I could go on..I hate all kinds of sthereotypes, racisms, intolerance, bromides, banalities and common places.
Some other interests I have are all art forms, going to the theatre, museums, cultural anthropology, psychology, I'm married to my laptop and I spend with it most of my time (nerdy moviemaniac:), meditation and holistic practicies are something that make me feel better, and I guess I'm trying to put everything I would write in this blog, in this one post, so I better stop myself here.
Enjoy and hope to e-meet ya'll soon!

P.S. One of the things that have inspired me to open this blog has been the girl blogger I link sideway: Sarah Churman, which I thank, who's sharing with the world her positivity and her way to sometimes feel unique in this world and blessed with late first times of something she can teach us to feel blessed for.